The 7 paths are specific gates that lead us into the heart of the problem. The 7 paths are the following: Denial: we live our lives oblivious to the reality of our situation. Settling: we feel unworthy or undeserving so we take what we can get. Playing Out: the unhealthy behaviors we unconsciously exhibit offer hints as to what in us needs to be healed. Acceptance: we recognize that we need to change, and understand our trauma as a stage on the journey of transformation. Intention: we begin to act from a conscious, sensible mind; we “set our sails” toward the life of our dreams. Spirituality: we live in the awareness that our thoughts, words and actions matter; we matter; love & peace are possible. The New Story: to write our new story, first we have to identify and heal the old one.
The Soul’s Coach – 7 Paths to Healing Relationship shows the reader how one’s reality is a reflection of one’s own perceptions. Whatever is going on “out there” is a mirror that holds the key to one’s healing. By going through the 7 paths to healing relationships the reader will realize that our lives are the outcome of our thoughts and that changing our thinking will change our lives.
Path One – Denial
If we deny our problems we don’t have to face the music.
Living in denial allows us to avoid confronting our challenge, a challenge that could lead to a breakthrough. When bad things happen to us we are upset, traumatized, the rug has been pulled from underneath our feet, yet we look the other way, too afraid to face the situation. The only way out of this conundrum is to recognize what triggered it, ride the energy back to a similar experience in our childhood that is the root cause of the present upset – and resolve that.
Path Two – Settling
Take what you can get when you can get it.
We settle into an unhealthy and unhappy relationship because leaving it is too frightening, we’d be pitted against an unknown future that could be even worse. So we take what we can get and hold on to damaging situations. If we track this pattern back to an earlier time in our lives, we’ll discover that somewhere in our formative years we experienced pain and trauma from which we concluded that we were unworthy and undeserving of a better life. That conclusion is ingrained in our subconscious and still calling the shots. But with inner child work and by identifying our projections it is possible to mend the wounds of the past, to recognize our worth, and find the strength of heart to move forward toward the life and relationship we seek.
Path Three – Playing Out
Our behaviors reflect our hidden wounds asking to be healed.
If we find ourselves behaving in ways that are disturbing to us or to our surroundings, we better listen carefully. This behavior is an indication that something is wrong on a deeper level. We are unconsciously playing out our unresolved childhood traumas and wounds. Identifying our destructive behaviors, understanding and healing their root causes, will lead us on our journey toward the life we so wish for.
Path Four – Acceptance
Accepting that we have a problem is the most important step to positive transformation.
It is the most important step and the most difficult one. It is almost impossible to accept such challenging situations as bankruptcy or one’s teenage child addiction to a heavy drug, or the infidelity of a spouse. It is equally difficult to accept our own inner “enemies”
such as envy, rage or self-loathing. But when we find ourselves swallowed into the “Belly of the Whale” by any such ordeals, there is no other way but to accept our reality and continue our restoration without losing energy on resentment or debate.
Path Five – Intention
“The breeze of grace is always blowing; set your sail to catch that breeze.” – Ramakrishna Paramahansa
While the breeze of grace is always blowing, it is our job – our self-effort – to set our sails to catch that breeze. This is Intention. We may know our destination, we may know the conditions of the journey, but if we do not prepare, if we do not make all the inner and outer changes and adaptations and think-up all the steps and alliances, we’ll never reach our goals, no matter how favorable the breeze of grace will be.
Path Six – Spirituality
“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” – Rumi
Spirituality is both a point of view and a practice. It is the understanding that we come to this life with a purpose, and the purpose is to live in the Loving that is our basic nature. Everything we have experienced since childhood to the present day has created who we are today. The lessons we’ve learned amplify our wisdom and strength, our positive attitude, and our grateful hearts. We no longer point the finger; we no longer live in a “house of glass and throw stones.” We have become more whole. Meditation, contemplation, chanting, art, walks in nature, are tools that help us sustain our wellbeing and bring us back to center when we fall off.
Path Seven – The New Story
You can choose who you want to become.
Our old story has set us up for much pain and failure. It wasn’t really “our story,” but we came to believe it was due to past conditioning and trauma. The new story sets us up for joy and success in all areas. It’s a rewrite: from a victim’s experience of life to living in the awareness that our true essence is Loving and that we are the co-creator of our lives – of our new story – a heroic story as such!